“Man, painting is such a bitch when you’re four feet tall,” says Christy, who might be pregnant just two episodes after bullying The Todd into proposing. “When little people have a baby, there’s a 25 percent chance that it will not survive.”
Inspirational start to this episode.
It gets worse when Christy discusses the “sexual calendar” she keeps on her phone. But then there’s a dancing scene and that’s fun (see above). Until Briana starts bitching about her ex-husband — “I’m a Facebook stalker” — who has a new girlfriend and now she’s harping about how he cares more about the new gal than the daughter or something.
This show, man, it’s like they go so overboard so as not to be “different” than the normals that it’s like the uncut coke of catty drama.
Anyway, Terra and Tonya are practicing for a “performance” in front of an estimated 1,200 people in a few weeks. They’re impersonators. Mini-Gaga and the like.
Fun fact: Hot Russian LWLAdy Elena also performs as Mini-Gaga, so it was brave of Terra to invite her to the upcoming performance.
There’s a speed-dating scene. Not a fetish speed-dating event, which is kinda good but a lotta bad.
Kevin. Robert. Daryl. A lot of fellas in sales.
Tonya wants a BMW (“black man working”). Magically, black man from Chicago pops up at the table. Name’s Trevore. He seems smoove. She asks how tall he is (then says he ain’t as tall as he say he is) and whether he’s circumcised. He hopes to hear from her again.
(They have a second date. Among the things she wears is a multifingered ring that reads, “BOSS.”)
Briana brings Terra with her to the Y so she can grill the ex Leif about the whole girlfriend jawn. Pretends that she doesn’t really want to meet the woman and size her up or anything. Afterwards, she wants to go out and grab a glass and a half of booze so she wakes up with a headache.
Cut to Christy and The Todd heading out to watch the sunset. We’re back, for the second week in a row, to a discussion of how dwarfism affects pregnancy (Todd tears are shed when discussing a past failed pregnancy and, wow, that sucks). Christy being Christy, however, is now worried about how she can tell The Todd she might be pregnant.
We will all be Rhodes Scholars in the ways of “double dominant” pregnancy by the time this first season ends.
PERFORMANCE TIME! Terra’s all worried Tanya (aka Mini Beyonce) is more worried about Trevore’s ass and less about her own when they’re prepping for tha show.
Then, Mini Bey and Mini Gaga take the stage like they were flung from a rave-tent slingshot.
That’s when everybody notices that Mini Bey’s tittie is hanging out of her costume. To wit:
Regardless of Nipplegate, Terra maintains that “TnT Rocked The House!” So they wanted to go “party, party” after the show.
Elena is holding court outside about how her superiority of Gaga impersonation. Nobody challenges this assertion.
Terra’s drummer boyfriend Joe shows up late for the show (he was out of town, so that he’s even there is a win for Terra. However, Terra done gets pissed that Joe is making on Hot Russian LWLAdy Elena. Again.
Pfft. Whatever. The REAL Gaga wouldn’t cry about this nonsense.