Weekend Reading Roundup (Petty Gossip Edition)

Y’know, I’m totally down with the Vatican today. Who else would have the balls to deem a worldwide outbreak of priests-diddlin-young-children-itis as merely “petty gossip”? I mean, sweet Christ, 200 deaf kids getting molested really is a Perez Hilton item, not evidence that a cult with mind control over millions of millions feels that its people can do whatever the hell they please with no outside ramifications?
So, bravo to you, Cardinal Angelo Sodano, for putting the hardcore bukkake porn into the term “solid rock.” In fact, you’ve inspired me to dispense with the petty gossip sitting here on my desk so I can get back to finding mute kids to help me find my lost puppy. Because now, I can’t possibly rip on …
— Talx Corp., an organization committed to kicking jobless people square in the nuts by challenging their unemployment claims.
— And Google, for not abiding by their “do no evil” mantra in the case of a Camden activist whose online presence got disappeared for 11 days.
— And, finally, Rolling Stone. But not for an intriguing print piece about Clay Marzo, an Asperger’s afflicted mega-surfer (in the issue featuring Lea Michele’s pantied bum on the cover.) But, for again not making it available online, even if you have a subscription. Which makes me ponder cancelling mine.