There’s A Dude Publicly Banging Swiss Cheese In Philly

Swiss Cheese

Yeah, yeah, yeah, people been writing about this since yesterday afternoon, but I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if Philly Blunt didn’t record the Swiss Cheese Pervert for posterity’s sake. From the Mayfair Town Watch:

Good Morning Mayfair! Please be aware of the Swiss Cheese Pervert! This individual is driving around surrounding communities and exposes himself to women. He offers them money to watch him put swiss cheese on his privates. He is a white, heavy set male, 40-50 years old. He drives a newer model silver sedan. He was also spotted in a black newer model sedan. If you see this guy, don’t confront him. Get his plate number and call 911 immediately!!! We have passed all the information to the 15th PD.

Never stop being you, Philly.

And, 15th District investigators, how about hitting the neighborhood deli and asking about skeevy dudes drooling at the meat counter?

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