Philly Blunt

Divorce Court: Matthew Desind vs. Bridget Desind

Brian — Fri, 18 May 2012 18:25:21 +0000

Ok, these two were married for six years, got divorced and are considering reconciliation. As such, this is a Divorce Court first. Judge Lynn seems energized by this.

They got together at 14. Pregnant at 17. “Which drove us to the idea of getting married,” said Matthew, who was “a boy trying to fill a man’s shoes.”

He seems rather genuine. THAT is a Divorce Court first, too.

Here’s the rub for him: Bridget’s got herself a temper. You can see it in her eyes. They’re not those “diaper astronaut” crazy eyes. Or those dark, dead shark eyes. Cute smile despite clenched jaw. But still.

She loved her freedom, too. Didn’t much miss him during the separation. He said he missed her. Getting teary-eyed. Kind of a flip-flop from previous separations.

Huh, she kept the name, though, so there’s that.

Then, they get into how she has all these male friends. And she cut her hair and lost some weight. And how he’s jealous.

“You are blossoming,” said Judge Lynn.

You know what’s going on here: His girl got a bit hotter so now he wants her back. However, the girl who got a bit hotter now knows what life is like for a-bit-hotter girls so she’s totally digging all the attention. So, she’s numbed herself to the point that she ain’t about to go back to the dude who kicked her to the curb, thus inspiring these physical improvements.

Good for her. In another Divorce Court first, and even though they decided to stay together after the L.A. trip, there’s a Def Leppard song to close this post out.

Your Semi-Regular #Maury Show Screengrab

Brian — Fri, 18 May 2012 15:15:36 +0000

Meet Jon and Cheyenne. They’re married. That lady on the screen is Chelsea. She’s Cheyenne’s friend. She’s also Jon’s friend. So much so that Cheyenne claims she found n00dz of Chelsea on one of three cell phones that Jon keeps.

While the lie detector determined that Jon has, in fact, cheated on Cheyenne — a finding that led her to state the relationship was over — it also maintained that Jon and Chelsea were not, in fact, carrying on an affair behind Cheyenne’s back. So, there’s that.

Watch The Female Bruce Lee Play With Nunchucks

Brian — Fri, 18 May 2012 14:23:30 +0000

This is a video of “JuJu Chan the Female Bruce Lee showing off her Kung Fu and Nunchucks.” Which is awesome. Apparently, per the video, JuJu Chan the Female Bruce Lee has some sort of movie coming out today as well. Whatever. It’s a chick with nunchucks. That in and of itself makes it postworthy.

He’ll Tell You Once, You Sons Of Bitches, He’s The Best Taxidermist That’s Ever Been

Brian — Fri, 18 May 2012 02:31:10 +0000

A sharp-minded Deadspin tipster sent along a link to “Still Life, a documentary about the life and work of renowned taxidermist Frank Newmyer.” This two-minute preview is pretty damn boss in a glimpse into a world one wouldn’t normally see. It’s also pretty damn hilarious in a “For Your Consideration” type of way.

Hit-and-Run America, Vol. CCCXXI

Brian — Thu, 17 May 2012 19:22:47 +0000

Aliya Hamilton

An ongoing collection of unsolved hit-and-run cases, with a focus on car/pedestrian incidents, from across the country since Jan. ‘010. If you know something about any of these incidents, or one that I’ve missed, do the right thing and call the police, even anonymously.

1542. Austin, Texas. May 15. Pedestrian killed when struck by a 2007 Mazda SUV which fled the scene but was caught nearby.

1543. Dublin, Cal. May 15. Bicyclist believed to be 55-to-60-years-old dies after being struck by a black 2010 or 2011 Mercedes-Benz which fled the scene.

1544. Chicago, Ill. May 16. Woman seriously injured when struck by a maroon Saturn which fled the scene.

1545. Framingham, Mass. May 16. 21-year-old man injured when possibly struck by a tan or beige sedan that may have been in the area.

Related stories:

And I quote (I)…

The family of Max Torres is not looking for revenge. In fact, they want to offer forgiveness to whoever was behind the wheel of the white Chevrolet Traverse SUV that hit his motorcycle Friday afternoon, then left the scene of the accident.

And I quote (II)…

The man was being chased west on I-82 by the driver of another vehicle he had struck earlier in Wapato, troopers said.

After hitting the stop sign, the man fled on foot, and jumped into the Yakima River in the Parker area to avoid police.

Authorities launched a rescue boat, but the man safely made it out of the river. He entered and exited the river again as authorities pursued him, the State Patrol said.

And I quote (III)…

GREENVILLE, N.C. – Police have arrested the suspect they say fled a hit and run crash that destroyed 12-15 cemetery headstones.
Officers took 22-year-old Brandon Michael Jackson into custody just after before 1 p.m. Tuesday afternoon. He’s charged with 1 count each of Failure to Report an Accident involving property damage, and Operating a Motor Vehicle without a license. He was jailed under a $10,000 secured bond.
Jackson is a former running back for ECU. He was kicked off the team back in 2010.

And I quote (IV)…

California Highway Patrol officers are investigating a suspicious car fire that occurred Monday on Foxen Canyon Road in connection with a fatal hit-and-run accident Sunday at the interchange of Highways 101 and 166.

And I quote (V)…

TYLER, Texas (AP) — Police say a driver sought after three people were run over during an East Texas fight has been located after seeking medical help.

Tyler police on Tuesday did not immediately disclose charges or how the female driver was hurt during the parking lot brawl.

Investigators say two men and a different woman were seriously injured early Monday in a fight involving nearly a dozen people. Police say a woman driving an SUV ran over the victims before speeding away.

And I quote (VI)…

Saying he is “not at all happy with the initial investigation,” Ansonia Police Chief Kevin Hale said his department has relaunched a probe into a hit-and-run crash that left an Ansonia teenager seriously injured last year.

The development comes after the woman’s mother took to social media last month to ask why police hadn’t done more to look into the case.

“They’re upset,” Hale said Wednesday. “And they have a right to be.”

And I quote (VII)…

LOS ANGELES (KTLA) — Police are searching for a driver who slammed into a high-end car body shop in the South Robertson area and then ran away.

The accident happened just before 4 a.m. at Specialty Craft Car in the 1800 block of South La Cienega Boulevard.

Police say a Lincoln Towncar crashed into the body shop, damaging a Ferrari and a Lamborghini inside.

And I quote (VIII)…

The driver of a brown SUV gunned it to make a quick left across two lanes of general traffic plus a bike lane on Dexter Ave last July. But PATH photographer Mike Wang was traveling in the bike lane at that moment, and the driver struck Wang, killing him. After stopping for a moments, the driver of the vehicle fled.

The case remains unsolved.

Now, the Taiwanese Association of Greater Seattle is offering a $6,000 reward for any information that leads to an arrest in the case.

Caught, convicted, court appearance or car-on-car in … Richland, Wash.; Mondovi, Wisc.; Las Vegas, Nev.

More hit-and-run stories, including every volume of Hit-and-Run America (in reverse order), are accessible from this linked page. (The full Volume-by-Volume list will appear sporadically from now on.)

And Now For One Of The More Disturbing Philly Sports Images In Quite Some Time

Brian — Thu, 17 May 2012 13:46:19 +0000

NBA Action, it’s FANtastic.

Hit-and-Run America, Vol. CCCXX

Brian — Wed, 16 May 2012 00:00:22 +0000

Phoenix hit-and-run victim Martha Sanchez
An ongoing collection of unsolved hit-and-run cases, with a focus on car/pedestrian incidents, from across the country since Jan. ‘010. If you know something about any of these incidents, or one that I’ve missed, do the right thing and call the police, even anonymously.

2535. Queen, NY. May 13. 47-year-old man fatally struck by a dark colored sedan which fled the scene.

2536. Modesto, Cal. May 12. Pedestrian fatally struck by a Toyota sedan which fled the scene.

2537. Memphis, Tenn. May 12. Pedestrian struck by a late-model four-door sedan which fled the scene.

2538. Erie, Pa. May 13. 51-year-old man fatally struck by an unidentified vehicle which fled the scene.

2539. San Francisco. May 12. 62-year-old man in critical condition after being struck by a late-90s model Chevrolet SUV, possibly a Suburban, with tinted windows and a California license plate with the last two numbers “24,” which fled the scene.

2540. Hutchinson, Kansas. May 12. 26-year-old man’s leg amputated below the knee after struck by a motorcycle which fled the scene.

2541. Nashville, Tenn. May 14. Pedestrian struck by an unidentified vehicle which fled the scene.

Related stories:

In which the Mets gets sued in relation to a hit-and-run fatality…

The family of a Staten Island woman killed in a hit-and-run is blaming the Mets for getting the driver too boozed up at Citi Field on April 5, the night she died.

A lawsuit filed May 6 names the team, driver Brian McGurk, his friend Robert Kelly, stadium vendors and a local bar, Nurnberger Bierhaus on Castleton Ave., as all allegedly responsible for the woman’s tragic end.

McGurk, 40, allegedly left the scene after mowing down Clara Almazo, 57, who bravely saved her 8-year-old grandson’s life by pushing him away from the speeding Ford Escape as they were walking home from Holy Thursday church services.

Meanwhile, on Saturday, Timothy Cardinal Dolan, invoked Almazo’s sacrifice in a moving commencement speech at his alma mater, Catholic University in Washington.

“Clara’s selfless act of heroic love was, as you might imagine, the tearful talk of New York over the Easter weekend,” Dolan said.

Her “life-giving act was made the more poignant as it came on the night before Jesus died.”

And I quote (I)…

Garner, N.C. — Garner police are looking for a man who shot another motorist and fled from the scene of a wreck early Sunday.

Around 1 a.m., a red, late-model sedan rear-ended a 2001 Toyota car leaving a shopping center on Jones Sausage Road, between East Garner Road and U.S. Highway 70. A confrontation occurred, during which the sedan driver asked the man and woman in the Toyota not to call police.

When the two refused, police said, the sedan driver shot the Toyota passenger, Marcario Nunez Bustos, four times and fled the scene.

And I quote (II)…

BAKERSFIELD, Calif. (KBAK/KBFX) — The son of the woman accused in a deadly hit and run crash that happened May 7, says his mother left the crash scene to call police.

And I quote (III)…

Gomez and about two dozen family members attached flyers to the balloons they hope will land back on the ground and into the right hands.

The flyers describe what happened to Gomez’s mother, Martha Sanchez.

She was crossing Indian School Road and 28th Street when she was hit by a car that never stopped back in February.

“We’re not going to forget,” said Jennifer Duran, Sanchez’s daughter-in-law.

“Somebody had to have seen something or know something,” Gomez said. “We’re just hurting.”

Police think Sanchez was hit by a person driving a dark colored, small sized sedan.

“They pretty much just left her to die there,” Gomez said.

“It’s the day before mother’s day and it’s our first mother’s day without her,” Duran said.

And I quote (IV)…

An alleged drunken driver is accused of crashing into a car on Highway 101 and then trying to push the other driver into traffic.

Joshua Fowler, 30, of Santa Rosa, was arrested after sideswiping a vehicle in San Rafael and assaulting the other car’s driver and passengers, the California Highway Patrol said.

The incident occurred around 6:50 p.m. Friday, when Fowler was driving a 2001 Mazda Tribute south on Highway 101. Multiple drivers called to report a reckless driver shortly before the collision.

Caught, convicted, court appearance or car-on-car in … Aurora, Ill.; Pittsburgh, Pa.; Knoxville, Tenn.

More hit-and-run stories, including every volume of Hit-and-Run America (in reverse order), are accessible from this linked page. (The full Volume-by-Volume list will appear sporadically from now on.)

So, Yeah, This Kid “Krispy Kreme” Is Totally The Worst Rapper Ever

Brian — Tue, 15 May 2012 22:59:06 +0000

Here are some lyrical excerpts from “The Baddest”:

“Even if you had infinity knives, I would punch you up into the air like a kite.”

“I’ll bet you sleep with a nightlight, because you’re scared of the dark and you stink like a fart. Well light your fart on fire with my rhyyyyyyymes. You think I won’t. I do it all the time.”

“Compared to me, Jay-Z is lay-Z.”

Bonus footage:

• “Krispy Kreme and Money Maker Mike – Haters Wanna Be Me”

• William Shakespeare response

Here’s Video Of A Really Cute Baby Orangutan Climbing For The First Time

Brian — Tue, 15 May 2012 22:32:01 +0000

Aw.

Next Up On The Embarrassingly Bad Video Charts: LaSalle’s Lady Lacrosse Team

Brian — Mon, 14 May 2012 15:05:51 +0000

I don’t know what “One Direction” is. Nor do I know whether “What Makes You Beautiful” is their greatest — only? — hit. But I know I wish I’d never seen the LaSalle U lacrosse team’s take on said song from said band. That’s why I’ll subject you to it, as well.